I watched a You-Tube video this week – a clip from X-Factor UK 2012, the singing audition of Christopher Maloney. Christopher was battling an extraordinary case of the nerves – and then he began to sing. With an amazing voice he belted out a powerful and moving rendition of The Rose. It was one of those moments that take your breath away. At the end of the standing ovation he received from the audience, the judges expressed their amazement at his talent.
One of the judges asked with emphasis “Do you not believe in yourself? Can you not hear yourself?”
Christopher stutteringly responded that people had told him not to embarrass himself.
In unison – the chorus of judges reacted “WHO SAID THAT?”
“People… just people.” Christopher Maloney responded.
The questions resonated in my head … “Do you not believe in yourself?” “ Who said that? Who told you that?” I struggle with my self-confidence and belief in what I have to offer. I have lived a great deal of my life overwhelmed by the voices that tell me that I don’t have what it takes, not to think too highly of my self and that I will never measure up. WHO SAID THAT? – I want to shout at this moment. More importantly, why do I choose to keep listening? The words paralyze, handcuff and bind me into inactivity. Why DO I give them the power to sabotage the dreams and purposes in my life?
I believe in the treasure that God has placed in every one of us, and of the gift He wants us to share with the world. Am I sharing my riches with the world when I listen to those echoes in my head? Am I living the life that God has called me to live? Am I being the woman God has called me to be?
Psalm 139: 13-16 The Message translation Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother’s womb. I thank you, High God—you’re breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made! I worship in adoration—what a creation! You know me inside and out, you know every bone in my body; You know exactly how I was made, bit-by-bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something. Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you, The days of my life all prepared before I’d even lived one day.
This is the challenge in this season of my life – to step beyond fear, to step beyond self-doubt, to step beyond self – limiting beliefs and to step beyond voices of condemnation. It is time for me to step INTO life. Because, “body and soul, I am marvelously made!”